Act of transgression

• The cigarette I smoke ensembles the entire city as I look at the street lights through the window. A sudden glimpse of them makes me inquisitive. He pushes her forcefully to the wall and seizes her waist with his muscular hands. Her poison nails dug his back with much force. They kiss each other; lick each other, her razor sharp canine’s dugs through his slithery skin. I watch them with much attention and curiosity. The two bodies penetrate into each other, as if fighting for the release. They make hate, they fight, they try to kill the very emotions inside. She moves besides the wall while he slides on her causing her immense pain of hate. She loves it. As he bends down and her face turns upside, I choke. I followed her for miles, her tender fragrance got me to this building and there she was, in massive pain of satisfaction. I drop the cigarette down and stand still, witnessing the act of transgression.

  
  

  -Nudelessens!

Rahul: The Wings Of My Muse…Finished Edition. With Bonus Reprise (Thanks Katsa!)

Rahul: The Wings Of My Muse…Finished Edition. With Bonus Reprise (Thanks Katsa!)

© Akshay, Katsa & Rahul

The Wings Of My Muse…Finished Edition. With Bonus Reprise (Thanks Katsa!)

The dark coming of the nature
Makes her wonder,
Wonder if someone’s waiting for her
The thick black clouds, they seemed to cry
Cry for freedom, freedom from thy sins
Heaven is what she felt, in his solace, she went dim
Tears of bliss crashed from her eyes,
What was caged, now was a free soul
While, she stood beside the creek
And he peeped from behind the tree
Did she vanish, caring not for freedom, or was she free now?
Was it a delusion, he knew not
He’ll know not… (Rahul)

To see her wings peep out when you’d least expect it,
would be a privilege she offered a prized few.
The tuft of hair blowing in the wind,with soft curls that matched her cheeks.
The curve of her back took a wild turn into her hips.
But you’d never notice.
You’ll always be more dazzled by her lips.
With the twilight as your witness and the dusk as your guide.
You’d follow her through the path she would shine in the dark.
She’ll take you to the lake at night,
bear you witness to the shimmer of her glowing skin under the stars.
Be quick to catch the elusive glimpse;
She’d have spread her wings,
She’d have been gone. ..(Akshay)

(Reprise…)
She is free……tears
spilling over her eyelashes
she cannot stop them…the tears.

They splash - onto her face
down down down
cleansing her soul.

Her soul - this baptism of water -
down down down.

Then up to heaven - up up up
she soars.
As an eagle - a falcon with a message … .
to heaven she goes… (katsa)

© Akshay, Katsa & Rahul

New Wordpress Blog

Hello everyone,

Please visit my new blog at wordpress http://gypsyroadrastapeople.wordpress.com and let us know how it is!

The blog's been put up by three like minded ridiculous hippies.

Cheers

Absurd Reality

Reality, as they all call it, is an oppression of life. Why do we even label it reality, is it for real? I guess NOT. People pretend to be what they are not; and what they are, they know not. What is so real about it? I don’t know, do you? I guess you don’t. Katherine Anne Porter once said, “Our being is subject to all the chances of life. There are so many things we are capable of, that we could be or do. The possibilities are so great that we never, any of us, are more than one-fourth fulfilled.” This is reality which we human beings are scared to accept. Reality is not the only truth that exists in this universe, indeed it is the only lie and we gladly take it as the only truth. Everything in this world is real, as we may think. Everything we eat, we see, we feel is real, we think. Everything we do is real, we think, is it?

Reality is an illusion, for what we simply think exists plain simply does not, reality is relative, my heart goes out the life that decided to build civilizations upon the very earth which they did not believe existed. A life even they did pay heed to and thus began their quest to reach the heavens above. A heaven which may be a figment of your imagination, a hope towards something substantially better, a hope towards something that may not exist. Is this uncertainty of reality worth the hope? Truth, reality, hope, heaven, hell, none of them existed when the universe came to be. None of us ever thought of taking the right directions, and thus hell was created. Heaven does not exist, till date. It’s just a figment of your imagination. Life’s like that , absolutely sham and reality adds to the misery of it.

Reality bites, and mind starts working in a robotic manner and kills that very heart inside. Every claim of following the heart is counterclaimed. Every effort of overcoming this reality is overcome by the malfunctioning of mind. It becomes a part of the psyche. The machine starts following the codes that are being fed into it, and fails to recognize the voices which used to function it prior. Everything becomes lunatic; everything becomes systematic, following the predefined systems. What you believe is real, what you do is not. They say, “Your thoughts create reality”. I say NO, they don’t. It’s a system, a system of worms crawling in a systematic manner, thus resulting in a body that is you. And yet society finds comfort and sense in what seems as chaos. Complicated lives are the most stable and comfortable for the herds who have no real vision. And thus begins the journey of a lone man who has seen simplicity and non-linearity of life, from the dark to life, from death to life, from the machination of order to the serenity in chaos.

Reality comes into picture when a man tries to overcome his fears of getting rejected through the dreams he once lived. He might tend to chase the road he wants to take, only to fail through the fears walking side by side. “University does not and shall never allow this”, he says. “Whatever he believes is stupid, what he does is not”, they say. “The day you’d start listening to the voices in your head, you will be the man you’ve always wanted to be”, we say. Relativity between reality and absurdity is undefined, still for us, it means the same. Reality is not the only phenomenon which may act as the savior of mankind, but yes the way we are handling it, it has become what we never wanted it to be, absurd as ever.

For the entire cycle you live, reality is the only force which acts through your mind, giving you the thoughts of no use, thus entering you into a whole new dimension of this cycle which may have never existed given the fact that reality were never into the picture. Via the distant mindless hopes, the bird tries to fly around, for an escapade from the ridiculed reality, analyzing the wrongs and rights throughout the journey. What to take and what not, is an individual decision he may take. Whether drink from the bucket, or from the lake, is an individual notion. Sky is limitless, and so are the ideas of life. Wandering into the absurd realities serve no real purpose. Why do you need to rely on reality while you have some blue and white walking side by side?

© Akshay & Rahul

Slum for the Rich ...

Marked by walls and putrid tiles,
Lies a sanctum for reasons and lies.
Thus insecure lies a man within
Has not seen light for a while.

What do these walls protect,
What do these heavy gates guard,
A serene facade of sanity,
Or reasons why one tried too hard.

These walls that protect shall also divide,
The sky above you the roof blocks.
Division of a demented minds,
a lack of freedom that one forgot.

Caged in gravel, concrete and dust,
where once was life now decay and rust.
Rodents feel more free,
the strays outside the walls more at peace.....(Akshay)

What do thee hold in mind?
A phony smile, behold hundreds of swine
Longing for the end of war, inside
Through closure of time, thou walls shall fight

Thou engraved silence rules the realm of senses
Stranded in the web, thou reap your crops
Them four walls, they laugh aloud
And them four candles, they burn and shout...(Rahul)

Mark my words for they are bleak
the judgement cometh not for the frail and weak

Brick by brick the walls were built,
and brick by brick the walls shall fall,

A slum for the rich,
A slum for the rich,

Your city, gentleman,

Reduced to a slum for the rich!


© Akshay & Rahul

Tale of a bewildered man

I was standing on a broken road

With a bomb in my hand, and a gun in my hood

What could I do? Where could I go?

To drop the bomb, to shoot them all

She stood on the other side

And the sun shined through her face

It revealed the darkness she had in her chest

I was amused, I could linger

I could offer my flesh, to her

The ever ending road was ending there

And the scars on her face were confusing me

She was laughing aloud, she was dancing around

With a baby in her hand, she was crying, crying

Decimated she was, for reasons unknown

My mortal frame, was facing her

The end was a portal
Through the vistas finite

The bomb was gone, the gun was no more

She was brought back to life

Through a soul that was stole

I moved back, my re-birth was mounting

Through a mystic force, they call them life’s own ways

The sun was shining again

Illuminating, giving life rays

The war then ended, the turmoil was burnt away

For once now, I lay aside the gray

And I smile, I smile…

© Rahul

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Chapter 1

Chapter 1:

I am a ridiculous man. Though I was never this ridiculous before, but I have grown on this over a period of time. The day I graduated, I was more ridiculous. Having got a job offer in hand, I had a feeling of growing older, a more mature man. And then, I started working. Sometimes, I feel like screaming on the top of my lungs. Most days, when the days are bright, the nights always have something to offer. Nights, why aren’t they bright? Most of the times while I am awake through them, I am alive, almost every time. Clear plans gush through my mind, while I am alive. I have decided to leave everything behind and move on for a better life. This definitely is not me.

I have lost the count of the days. The Sun laughs at me questioning,” will you be able to survive this ridiculed life?” But my heart is at ease, it’s relieved. At least, I don’t have to go back to the chaotic place once I worked & practically lived in, and yes I smile. I hear nothing except the sound of wind, which tries it’s best to scare the hell out of me. Though I believe in His existence, still I know not if He will keep me going. Every now and then, I am approaching some or the other mirage with some hope in my heart and a can in my hand.

I can see the leaks in to sand, on the barren land. Every few minutes, I try to sneak through them hoping to find something, something to keep my mind working. My car has broken down. Is this the sole reason of me wandering into this desert? You know what I mean, I’ll rather let it water in to ambiguity, as I have my own reasons.

I can see a nude man at some distance. With a bleak face, he stares at me. He is standing nude from head to toe, with a horse by his side. He climbed the horse and vanished within seconds. This so-called lifecycle of human being is the same. You are born nude, and you die nude. You vanish within seconds and nothing possibly can be done about it. I have reached another figment of Him; and I know I’d find nothing or everything. Latter will never be right and the first of the two will never be wrong. I am facing illusions, or am I discovering my inner self? I am completely psyched, who am I? Twenty four years of existence and still I struggle, why? I am alone and forlorn, no one is around. I am struggling to find my existence. Is this an after-effect of heat, or the only truth? If this is the only truth, I have lied myself for an entire period of twenty four years. Damn!

Maybe I am me, or maybe I am the nude man. I am flying around the extinguished fire. I have felt content never. Lesser children used to pass by, smiling even if they had nothing, and you know that that is the best part. I had everything, yet I always was down, crazy, insane, red, blue ‘n all. I had every color in my pocket, still they were empty, and I was content never. And here I stand, a ridiculous man with nothing but ridiculous thoughts. Some unforeseen circumstances, both good and bad are waiting for me. Some would hug me; some would try to knock me down. I have planned to be indifferent to both. Cacti lives with thorns around them, but still are green, unlike the city trees, untrue trees. No one waters them; maybe this is the reason for the thorns around. I want to be like them, Cooperative - Acts -by Us (in short, Cactus).

As I am walking to an unknown destination, a fear starts to crop-up in my mind. It keeps on building, though I am unsure of what exactly it is. Is this because somewhere in my mind I know that my end is near? Or is this because of the fact that I know that the whole world’s end is near. It can be anything, but I have decided not to think about it and keep walking on the road to perdition.

“You are a sinister, you are NOT innocent“, and I am walking. I have decided to act as it comes. Everything is going color to blur. “Thou shall die, thou shall never survive”, the words are ringing in my head, over and over again. I can see a small hut, and a small girl is standing outside. I look at her and she passed a smile as if she welcomes me to her estate. With a straight face, I try to ignore her and keep on walking. We all do the same, and end up dying in the battle field. Don’t we? And I am no different, am I? Who knows, I may die with a smile or a cry on my face, everything depends on me. I can be me, or I can be that little girl. Reluctantly, I look behind, she is no more there. She has disappeared, and the hut has disappeared too. Mirage? May be yes. I am not shocked, for earlier I have witnessed a similar case. Remember the nude man? Wait; is the nude man the girl, and the horse the hut? Anyways, the journey under the Solaris continues. Nothing visible, nothing invisible. I am completely psyched. Ridiculous I have me as my partner. I am marking my directions every now and then, but that wind washes it away every single time. Nothing is permanent, nothing is static. An uncertainty is cropping up in my mind. A fear has started to build up in my heart. A body has started to give up, despite every effort to overcome the fears. But I have to keep going; something on left has advised me to keep moving, to save my survival, to discover my inner self. At times, I try to ignore the voices in my head, when my knees go weak and numb. But then, this is my only chance, the only chance to know what I really have been in the past twenty four years. And I carried on, overcoming every obstacle, every fear which tried thwarting my way to the ultimate discovery.

They call me a man of no words, for I try never to keep them. A man of no emotions, for I am not born with any. My father said I laughed while entering this world unlike any other kid, who usually would cry, though I always have my doubts. I never believed him and his self-made myths. As far as I remember, I have never smiled; laughter is out of the question. And I still doubt if ever I’ll smile. As I said before,” Deny the truth and you shall face it”, so who knows? Me not.

I remember a phrase my grandmother used to recite when I was young, “Credits must end for reel to roll over again”. A smile is a possibility after the reel would roll over again, but then, who knows? Me not. I was lost in thoughts, and then an eagle noticed me and tried to knock me down. Rightly so the eagle had attacked, as I have entered her territory. I may steal her food, or I may be her prey. Who know? Me not. Reason can be anything; she does not need to give them. I struggle and try to overcome her force, only to fail every time. I run and look for a place to hide, like a prey would do in such circumstances. Luckily, I save my self, only to be attacked again.

What waits for me, I know not. All I know is I know who I am. I can smile, I can see better days, and I can sense a better coming to life. I can feel a little Floyd in my head; I can sense a little green in my pocket. I feel like singing:

“I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the moment had arrived
For killing the past and coming back to life”.

I can see the nude man standing outside the hut. I can see him smile. I can feel a sweet little pain of satisfaction in my heart. Finally, I am my heart.

-Rahul

The Timeless Dream

The timeless dream stands in me

Falls in me, obscured by the nights

Silent, yet speaks beneath

The hidden clouds, flies high in the skies

Silent me – living becalmed, standing still

Into the broken tides

The standing clock, comforts me

Estranged me, and sometimes it barely finds

The moment that lives in me, that breaths in me

Somewhere when it hides

Silent me – looking behind, seeking hide

Into the broken tides

While I still have my doubts

You’ve already figured it out

Silent me – listening not, listening not

The mended wall, destroyed me

And paranoid me has fallen apart

And a chapter closed, the book is old

But reflecting me, still holding on

Holding on, and driving on

Finding home, driving on

Silent me – with the finest beer

I am driving on, on the freeway

Hoping to find a home, I may call it my own

Broken me, I was not breathing

Fighting me, I was not leading

Leading my way, to the freeway

To the freeway, yeah…

© Rahul

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Breath 'em all, Die along

Out of the blue, when the sun was shining
Into the light, some shadows fell
Deep in the sea, when the life was smiling
Into the air, some poison freaked

Into the clouds, when the moon was burning
Fine were those stars, but choked to death
Into the streets, when the grime were streaming
They came along, them reapers seemed

Some manholes open wide, free flowing
Some breathing trees, in last times
Into this city, of ignorant people
Where do we find, peace of mind

Into this city, when the kids were laughing
Someone fell dead, and a life fell asleep
Some people cried, some celebrated life
Caring not, of their own fate

This is the city, they call of dreamers
This is the place, of cheapest lives
Just look around, and see for yourself
What have you lost, and what is found

Voids, voids
Poisonous gases into air
Suffocation, and crimpy faces
Breath ‘em all, die along

-Rahul

Sardonic me, Sarcastic him!

Get out of the way kid
Can’t you see they’re dropping the bombs
Destroying the tombs
Here, bite this bullet and keep moving

Sarcastic him ran to death
I moved back and kept staring
With a gun, he killed and killed
And then I heard someone mourning

“Here you go, bite this bullet”
The words kept haunting me, daunting me
Sardonic me, sarcastic him
Sarcastic me, sardonic him

Agonistic me, holding my ground
Shaving my head, shaving my eyes
Shaving my tears, shaving my life
Sadistic me, Sardonic me

The lights died a silent death
The waters turned blue to red
Demising them, surviving sham
Flaunting me, grunting me

© rahul

June 30th, 2009

Image - Machinima (Might be subjected to copyright)

The everlasting dusk under the belt of moon

Swans dancing into the streets

Celebrating life, the life which thrive

Pieces of diamonds

Falling from the sky

In the wee hours, empty getting sky

The wind whirls, and swirls

Laughing little girls

Playing down the riverside

Exchanging words with unsaid forces

Called the silence of them children

One shall bid them farewell

One who works alone and never ceases to amaze

On the bay, who never rides the psyche?

Inside His secluded, spinning dreams

Of the everlasting dusk under the belt of the moon

-Rahul

22.06.2009

Psychedelic breakfast

Off the sun, I drink thy liquid
Facing him eye to eye
Off the sky, I eat thy cloud
Down the countryside while I drive

A surreal evening
A blur dream, hallucination
Dented by serenity of dark
Doomed by silence of bells

Un-ending roads of thoughts
Perpetual sagas of dew drops
Which rests unfettered in the realm of reality?
Thou hang on a new leaf
I’ll drink water of it

A feeling pervades to occupy
And entrust space of my mind
All I see is a dim of realism
Perceptions petrified by thy silence

I eat thy thoughts
To linger my hunger
Which never is satisfied?
By one, just one psychedelic breakfast

© rahul

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House
22.06.2009

AND THEN SHE CRIED

She took a while
To stand again
To gather herself
Again

Beaten by fate
She loved the hate that came her way
From everyone, from everywhere
She laughed, and then she cried

She was a mother
Of beaten fate
Her memories fade
While she slept late

And when she woke up
She couldn’t feel the sun
She could hear the mourns
She laughed, and then she cried

Everyday was the same old day
She couldn’t feel the rain
The plants were dead from long ago
She couldn’t even see them die

And then she took a while
To realize
That everyone was gone
Far away

She was the only one
Left alone
The love was gone
And hate was grown, and then she cried

© rahul

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Image Coutesy - desicomment.com (Might be subject to Copyright)

Her Silver eyes

She stands alone
While it rains over her head
Chaos around, running to catch the life, everyone
While she stands still

They say she’s blind
She can’t see a thing
But don’t they know
She’s got silver eyes
She can see the life

They laugh at her
And point the fingers at her
Instigating her to start a fight
But, she stands still and mocks at them

For she knows if the sun will rise
If it will shine again
Behind the blackened lines
She could burn the sun

They run around
Chasing the light
But, she can see the life
That breeds and seeds
Behind her silver eyes

She could see beneath the ground
Where lies the wise man
She hears him talk
The world’s not a safe place, today

And she wakes up in the wee hours
While everyone sleeps
In their souls, in their minds
Her shadow creeps
Through the rooms

But they say she’s deaf
She can’t hear a thing
While they don’t speak
She can hear them sigh

She can see them cry
Behind her silver eyes
Her silver eyes
Shining, laughing, and dry

© rahul

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Image - http://gallery.photo.net (Might be subjected to copyright)

Off-Color

My life runs around me
It surrounds me, and Me
My lies goes beside me
And steal a part of me, and Me

Tell me how're you gonna
Make it alright
Tell me more
Of the things you hide
Tell me more, tell no more

Intoxicated are my dreams
And I don't know what the acid is doing in my veins
Inoculated are my hands, not
And my legs have betrayed me, and Me

Let me know
Am I wasted
Oh let me know
Am I the chosen one

Tell me how're you gonna
Make me tight, again
Tell me more of the words
You never spoke, and never said
Tell me more, tell no more

Hibernating is my skin
It's going pale
And it's stinking
Inflated are my eyes
They're going frail
And not blinking

Let me know
Am I hated
Oh let me know
Am I the chosen one

Tell me how're you gonna
Save me from the beast
Save me now from the bats
They‘re pealing, yes pealing
My skin, and my dreams


© rahul

25.04.2009

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Image - www.elfwood.com (Might be subjected to copyright)

Mama, Don't try to wake me

Mama, don’t try to wake me
I am sleeping
Mama, don’t try to fix me
I am not broken
I am just down
Deep down under the bed

Fixing up all of my dreams
Lending myself a sound sleep
Mixing them up with some joys
On my knees, I am resting

Look at me I am smiling
Overlook, ignore my eyes
My tears are all fake
They keep lying
So, don’t hear them cry

I have turned off the lights
I am exiting them all
Crossing light of the sorrows
I have entered inside the wall

Overlook, ignore the eyes
They are fake
They are not weeping
So, don’t hear them cry

I have seen thousand suns
They no longer blind me
I have seen thousand moons
They no longer magnetize me

Mama, just ignore the eyes
I have blocked them both
And I have bounded tears in their closet
Now they won’t ever flow

Mama, don’t try to wake me
I am sleeping
While I am weeping
I am resting on my knees


© rahul

22nd April, 2009

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Image - Claude Monet (Subject to Copyright)

Alter

Divide, Divide
Clone walking side by side
Hey,
Cut open yourself wide

An evil smile
Proudly proud pile
The clone’s wile
Rising tides of Nile

He might kill you inside
And, abandon your pride
While you crawl
Your Alter-ego glide

See-hide, see-hide
From behind the wall
Swallow your pride
And, dig it inside

Divide, Divide
Clone walking side by side
Hey,
Cut open yourself wide

© rahul

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Image - http://www.kdp.se/old/lynn2.jpg

A life on thorns

I know I have written on this theme before, but I couldn't help it.















He lives on thorns
And no mercy is shown
Shabby clothes
Fathomless eyes
Searches for an answer
Searches for a door

A door to heaven
A playground
A see-saw, a merry go round
Some laughing lips, some innocent eyes
They get a hug after a fall

But he searches for an answer
And searches for a reason
Where are you father
Will you carry me on your shoulder?

Where are you Mother
I need a hug when I fall
And when I cry in the corner
With head on my knees

I want a kite, and a toy car
Coz for now, I play with the muddy ones
I want new clothes
Coz for now, all I wear are tatters

He is still searching for an answer
And a reason
Will this search ever end?
Will the reason present itself?

He shall wait till then
Washing bowls, and serving tea
I am sure, a reason does exist
and his lips, one day will carry a smile


© rahul

08.04.2009

Chaat Vaat Khaalo..!! Creative House

Image - http://www.sciencelearn.org.nz/ (Might be subjected to Copyright)

Silly Girl

Silly one - cracked pearls -
Such a fragile little girl -
Stories of gold -
in a brittle plastic mold
that never worked for her.
We wonder where they were.

Silly one - twice baked
in the sun - and overdone.
We're gonna take your toys.
We're gonna capture your boys.
Songs unsung -
that never belonged to you . . .
you leave us nothing else to do.

Silly one - seeking a planet
a clam shell - left behind.
Babbling like a runaway brook -
Running to nowhere -
that never belonged to anyone.

Why do you go on and on?
What do you pray for - on the phone?
Where do you hide when you're alone?

Silly One

We'll crush your pearls
We'll take your toys
We'll capture your boys

Silly One

We'll melt your gold
We'll answer your phone
We'll throw the first stone

© Katsa

April 2009

Image - 2.bp.blogspot.com/ (Might be subject to copyright)

This song is sole property of Katsa, and I have put it up on my blog with her permission..